If you’re someone whose life seems to be falling apart right now, here are some Sunday thoughts I wanted to share with you all. Before you go in and read, I want to give you a warm hug and say that it’s easier said than done but know that it will all be okay in the end. And I say this as I myself stand in the middle of some grave problems where some of my family members are suffering from terminal illnesses, my partners’ job is uncertain, financial liabilities are lingering over our heads and my own health is deteriorating all of a sudden. Basically, the start to year 2020 has not been that great for us. After days of worrying about it all, the situation has sadly not improved much.
As I lay in my bed this morning, wide awake, I was reflecting on how my plans for this year have gone for a toss because life rarely goes as planned, right? Being a positive person that I am, I was trying to figure out what good could be coming out of all this? Right now, it feels like I am in the middle of an avalanche and that the world is crashing. And that’s when I thought maybe it’s just about perspective. Having a deeper thought about the situation, made me see some positivity that I wanted to share with everyone. Life will not remain like this forever. There are a few things we should be looking forward to in times of adversity:
- Tough times unite families and reveal true friends: Good times are best enjoyed with Family and friends and Bad times are best endured with the same set of people. Unfortunately, not all people who are a part of your happiness or success would be a part of your bad times. What else was the need to coin the term “Fair weather friend” after all? No matter how widely separated you are, in terms of distance, from your siblings or your parents, their hearts shudder at the thought of your suffering. Adversity does bring a family together – that’s the beauty of blood relationships. And then there are some friends like family who have been with you since childhood and who have seen you go through your successes, your failures, your heartbreaks. These are the people who would kick your ass when you make a blunder. They would also stay the night with you at the hospital after your father’s heart surgery. You can turn to them and cry as loud as you want to because they won’t judge you or get tired of your woes. Hard times make you cherish these people more than you did before!
- Character Building: Problems in our life are beyond our control but how we react to them is not. And that’s what character is all about. We can either choose to be miserable and hateful towards the world thinking that all the problems in the world have been bestowed only on us or we can show the strength of our character, facing the problems head on , and set an example for those around us. The choice is ours.
- Being Grateful: We (including myself) take good times in our lives for granted. You might be nodding your head and saying that you thank God at every good thing that happens to you but I am sure your definition of “Good” is bench marked higher than what should be. The recent demise of NBA star Kobe Bryant and his 14 year old daughter emphasize that “Going to work and coming back home” is a blessing that each one of us should be grateful for but I am sure most of us take that for granted. That’s what adversities (in our lives or in others’) do to us – they make us see that the life “was not that bad” before this. Why at all did I waste time nagging and complaining that it’s not perfect? It isn’t going to be. For anybody. Ever.
- Becoming wiser: Of course, no one wants to learn it the hard way but “bad times are the best teacher”. You’d have never realized the problem with lending out money to “that friend” to help with his credit card bills until you needed help with some money that one time and he didn’t have “anything” to help you with. After you’ve overcome your problems, you’d find yourself to be a much wiser person, for your own benefit and also for the benefit of those around you. If that’s not enough, you’d have heroic stories to tell to your grandchildren about how you survived a tough time with the help of family and friends in turn inculcating similar values in them.
- It only goes up-hill from here: The best thing about life is its cyclic nature. The good balances bad in your life. The highs make up for lows in your life. After dusk, there will be a dawn or else the world will stop. So, even if you find yourself in the middle of an avalanche (like I feel right now), believe that there will be a path that will take you uphill from here. Life is constantly changing and evolving. Our role is to accept the change instead of resisting it.
Here’s hoping that life will soon turn out to be a happy place for all of you. Till then, stay strong!